It is days like these that I can remember the smell of the brisk desert air. It is days like these that I remember the warm sun shine, radiating down on me as I step out into dryness. I remember the dusty mountain trails behind my house...the Saguaro cacti waving back at me as I run through my neighborhood. Waking up to the sun shining through my bedroom window. The heat that would fill my lungs as I breathed in heavily with a sigh, knowing the 100 degree weather isn't quite over. This is a picture that I took last Spring, before moving to Kentucky.
Last night, Mercedes and I had the opportunity to go to dinner with a wonderful couple...Jim and Doodle Johnson. I have never met anyone named Doodle before, until now, and I can say quite honestly, that she is one of the cheeriest, happy, smiley individuals I have ever met. Anyways, Jim proceeded to talk about how he had been to the Grand Canyon, and has been to Ireland, and that there are no words that can explain either one. The Grand Canyon and all its beautiful color, ridges , and magnificence. And Ireland...there is no green in the world that can be compared to green grass over the ocean. You just cant explain it...you can't simply tell someone what it looks like, and try to muster up a few words that will never do it justice.
Well, this is how I feel about my home town, Phoenix, AZ. Yes, I can post pictures like the one above and this one.
And this one.
But it will never do it justice. And for those of you who have lived in Phoenix, AZ your entire life, you know what I am talking about. These pictures were taken right down the street from my house, and as I look at these, tears are brought to my eyes. This is were I grew up, this is the place that I call home. And although I can try and try and try to explain the beauty in AZ, it will never due it justice. The smell monsoon....the sight of a dust storm...a sunset that you can never replace. I use to curse this place as I grew up, wanting to leave the dreaded heat and "boring" landscape.
What I would do to be sitting atop this mountain here, looking over "the Valley". Anything.
And you know, it may be some symptoms of home sickness, talking about what I miss, as we all do with places we once belonged, but I believe my point in all this is, take pride in where you are from. Take pride in the circumstances and situations that sculpted you into the beautiful person that you are. With every situation comes growth and knowledge and although you may not realize it in the moment, God uses everything to help you grow. Everything. It is just a matter of realizing the importance of that situation and taking advantage of the life you have been given.
I live in one of the most beautiful places in the country. Just to list a few reasons:
- It has all four seasons. Summer, Fall, Winter, Spring. And you get to experience all four.
- Leaves change, and wooded areas become canvases of different shades of yellow, orange and red.
- During the summer, you are surrounded with green. Trees are an abundance here, and blue grass is one of the most beautiful forms of grass I have ever seen.
- Rain comes and goes weekly here.
- Wildlife is a daily occurrence.
- I live in a town that has a "main" street. And it is the only street in a downtown that consists of no more then 30 shops.
- I know my neighbors, and they know me.
- I have use for a lawn mower, and American flags hang on almost every other house.
But I can tell you right now, with all the beauty that God has allowed me to see over this past four months, there is no beauty in the world that surpasses the beauty of where your roots are grounded. There is something about knowing that no matter how far you venture, home is still home, and nothing will ever change that.
Beautiful things don't ask for attention, but it seems Arizona holds a lot of mine.
This post goes out to everyone in AZ. My friends...my family...those who have made me who I am toady. Thank you for the guidance, structure, and purpose you gave me to succeed. I love you all and I am so thankful to have roots that reach back to the west coast.
Roots that gather their waters from a warm monsoon rain...that gather their nutrients from the dusty trails of Thunderbird Mountain...where Saguaros grow free, and coyotes roam to and fro...where the "Red Birds" reign and cold weather is just another dream...a place where grass is a rarity and swimming pools are the only hope...a place where love is in abundance. Thank you.
In other news,
This little guy. Turned 16 weeks today. Does anyone know what that means? He has a big day ahead, including losing his masculinity.
Sorry little buddy. IF only he knew what was coming, he wouldn't be smiling so much.
Fenway Update:
She is doing really great. she is about the size of a carrot now! It is nuts! I can wait to just squeeze her and love her! Only 4 more months, which seems crazy. Mercedes is beginning to feel her move a bunch, which is a great sign.
Over the past few days, I have been thinking a lot about being a father and what it entails, especially to a daughter. I made a list of things I want to be as a dad, some qualities I hope to have:
- How to braid hair and paint nails
- How to throw a wicked tea party
- Piggy Back Ride connoisseur
- Joyful
- Playful
- Adventurous
- Spontaneous
- Christ centered
- Creator of master sling shot
- Jokester
- Teacher of things that annoy mommy and then perfect execution of those things
- A hero
- Anti-workaholic
- Seeks truth and keeps his word
- Compassionate always showing love
- Lover and constant pursuer of my wife
- Holy Spirit driven
- Teacher of "winning"
- Not afraid to cry
- Treats her how she is suppose to be treated
- A hand worth wanting to hold
- Arms worth falling asleep in
- Can build a killer fort or castle or princess suite or what ever the heck little girls want when it comes to a fortress
- A dragon slayer, or boyfriend slayer....either one, given age
- An open book and a sealed vault
- Understanding
And I know things are going to change and that I have no idea what it means to be a dad, and I assume I will just figure it out along the way. These are just a few characteristics I hope to practice as a father, raising a daughter in Christ.
Speaking of beautiful things that don't need attention, this one gets ALL of mine.
This picture was taken within the second week that I had started "talking" to Mercedes...how things have changed. If you would of told me then that I was going to marry her, move across the country with her and now be having a baby with her, I would of punched you in the face...literally.
Why? For starters, to tease me with the idea of marrying someone like this would of been rude. Second, I was not lucky enough to hook someone on my fishing pole with so much beauty...so much love and a heart bigger then my big toes (if you haven't seen my big toes, they are something to see). But in all seriousness, when this picture was taken, she had just been baptized, and I was merely a friend of hers. Sure we liked each other, but to think that it would ever go further then a a few months was absurd.
And now I look back on moments like this and realize that they were the beginning of something great. They were the beginning of a life long friendship, a life long battle, a life long sleep over, and a life long love that can never be replaced. The beginning of an era.
I know you will be reading this Mercedes and I know I tell you everyday, but I love you from the deepest most inner part of my heart. My heart is over whelmed with joy and love for you. Your my best friend, my other half, an answer to a life long prayer. I prayed for you every day of my life, and I can tell you right now that I would never of made it to where I am today without you here beside me. Thank you for loving me like Jesus does...forgiving me like He does. And most of all thank you, in advance, for being the best mother in the world...the mother of our daughter. You are going to be a great mom.
"If you were a river in the mountains tall, the rumble of your water would be my call. If you were the winter, I know I'd be the snow, just as long as you were with me, when the cold winds blow."
(as I wipe my tears off the keyboard)
Last week I read a book called "Forgotten God" which is written by Francis Chan. He has a very interesting way of getting you hooked into the text, and keeping you there. And of all the books I have read in the past year (around 45) this is by far, the best one. And by a long shot.
The premise of the book is to give readers and insight as to how we have abandoned the trinity. Well maybe not abandoned, but the idea that as Christians we show a lot of emphasis on the Father and the Son but for some reason, leave the Holy Spirit alone...rarely seeking Him or allowing Him to work in our lives.
And one of the best points I think Francis gets across in this book is the idea that so many of us constantly search for the calling God has for our life, when in reality we should be looking for the calling God has for us TODAY. We live our entire life, searching and searching for the call God has for us. We know its out there...we know God wants to do something with us, but we can't seem to figure it out. So we keep searching. And keep searching. We make strategic plans on how to figure it out...how to secure or purpose and place.
But has it ever occurred to you that maybe, the Holy Spirit is talking to you right now? He is searching for you, calling out to you, but we are so focused on the future that we don't hear him. We are scared of whats coming, and spend so much time trying to figure it out, that we fail to see how God wants to use us right now.
Your sole purpose...your only purpose is to pursue God today. Not tomorrow, or in a week...in a month or in a year. But to pursue Him now...right now. Like, stop reading this and listen to God. And I am telling you, there is no better feeling in the world then knowing that you are in step with the Holy Spirit. That you are walking in His presence every, single day.
Believe me, God is going to use you for great things. He has created you in His image, a beautiful creation, for His plan. But you know what, that is for Him to know? His plans are so much bigger then anything you could ever predict or see coming.
"This is the day the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it." Psalm 118:24
Live in today. Thrive in it.
Until Next Time,
-JTD-
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